With four kids . . . .

Now, with four kids, the youngest of whom is worth two or three of the others in sheer energy usage, I have become THAT MOM.

The mom whose child has been going to Girl Scouts for several months but who is still (gasp), not even registered with Girl Scouts and is thus a shameless free loader who has no hope of selling cookies because she is actually illegal.

The mom who spends all day every day at school with her fourth child but whose child (she found out yesterday) actually has never officially been enrolled or registered in said school.  The mom who asked yesterday for paperwork to enroll this child, however this paperwork must have been given to this mom many times already since the admissions officer ROLLED HER EYES and sighed when I asked.  Yes, that mom.

The one who is still coordinating multiple doctors, blood tests and shoddy medical records to start a catch up vaccine schedule, making my child, once again, illegal at school.  But healthy, he’s very healthy.  Unlike this mom who has been hacking her pneumonia fumes at school for weeks.  But I’m medicated.  I’m very medicated. Calm down everyone.

The mom whose child desperately needs dental work but who keeps deferring the dental appointment because the thought of managing said child’s behavior in a dental situation feels too overwhelming. Plus how do I possibly find time to get there. Denial is working for that mom. For the moment.

I’m the mom who runs down the hill at the Color run to desperately sign my second child OUT of the Color Run before he even has a chance to run, to rush him home before I dash back to the other kids’ school to make sure the fourth child isn’t lost or damaged. The one who doesn’t make eye contact with the teachers while signing said child out.  And I used to volunteer at these events.

I’m the mother who is spending her Saturday morning carefully reading through and deleting dozens of low grade warning alerts from her second child’s school.  Who realizes that with this many grade alerts this child must be falling through the cracks somehow, but who isn’t sure how to manage that yet.  And yes, we used to be a straight A family.

I’m the mom who just checked my first child’s (the honors student sophomore) grades on Aeries for the FIRST TIME ALL YEAR and took a photo and texted her something about “that one missing assignment in honors English” basically just to prove to her that I am paying attention. I was that shameless, really.  And she knows exactly what I’m doing.  I’m that mom.

Today I’m thinking about paying bills overdue for months now at the doctors office.  I’m thinking about returning the way-too-late library books and facing what is sure to be an enormous bill. I’m checking Mint to see what my accounts look like and then looking quickly away.  I’m filling out a calendar and to-do list to get myself back on track.  And I’m having grace and humor for myself and this new life I find myself in.

My friends told me you have to relax your standards with four kids.  I just wasn’t prepared for what “relaxed” really meant.

Letting it all hang out here.  A little shamefacedly.  With a lot of laughter.

This too shall pass.

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